You're NOT the Boss of Me!

You're not the boss of me.  I don't like to be bossed around.  Not at work, not at home, not anywhere. I am not unique since most people do not like to be told what to do. Yet, on most days, someone is telling us what to do whether we realize it or not.

You may be our own boss or self employed, but your clients and/or customers are still bossing you around.  They tell you what they want, how they want it, when they want it or where they want it. I'll bet there are times when you'd like to tell them where they can stick it too!

As much as I don't like to be bossed around and told what to do, it is a reality in my life. To me, there is   a difference between being bossy and being a leader.  Bossy people tend to be insecure and unable to perform the task themselves so they resort to being demanding. They develop unrealistic expectations for their subordinates in order to overcompensate for their own inadequacies.  Leaders, on the other hand, learn from others and openly admit when they are wrong or just don't have an answer.

I have much more respect for a leader than a boss.  Anyone can be a boss - just give them the title.  Only a select few can be a leader. Throughout my career, I can count on one hand the number of great leaders I have had the pleasure of working with.  I remember those people - the leaders.  I learned valuable lessons from them - the biggest being the difference between a boss and a leader. I also learned the leader is not always the boss. Unfortunately, this happens all too often and the higher-ups don't even realize the damage they have done by selecting this boss rather than the leader. Usually because they, too, are also bosses and not leaders.

I have been told I am a challenge to 'supervise'. Not all that surprising.  I guess I am tired of being told what to do since I had seven bosses telling what to do my entire childhood!  I know I am not always right and don't always have the correct answers or even know what to do every time, but I also ask. I am not afraid to say, "I don't know."  I don't respond well to be being bullied or talked down to.  Each of us brings a different skill set to the table and can offer something valuable.  I am not perfect and definitely have my short comings, but I am also not a punching bag and refuse to be treated as such.  I speak my mind and voice my opinion. Thank goodness for freedom of speech!  

I tend to be a bit too blunt and aggressive for some, but then again, most females in law enforcement are not door mats. We did not stumble into our careers by accident.  Obviously, authority is a big part of my job especially with chain of command.  I have broken this chain on more than one occasion.  But shockingly, everyone survived! Only a few egos suffered damage.

But so goes life.  Authority.  It's always lurking behind every corner.  Sometimes it's waiting for you to mess up , but just maybe it's waiting to congratulate you on a job well done.  We all deal with it differently and some deal with it better than others.   At the end of the day, you must answer to you and decide if what you did or didn't do was the right thing.  You are the supreme authority over yourself since you have to live with you no matter what.